For the whole law is fulfilled in one word, "You shall love your neighbor as yourself." But if you bite and devour one another take heed that you are not consumed by one another (Galatians 5:14-15).
A couple of days ago I was checking out some of my archived material (perhaps I'm my own biggest fan) when I happened on a "Bullet" that was posted March 24, 2006 called THE VALUE OF MARRIAGE TO KIDS. A lady named Valerie commented on it and for some unknown reason I did not respond to her. (It might be good to go to the archive and read it for yourself.) Here is her comment:
I agree with most of your post, but how long does one stay in marriage being ignored, taken advantage of, and serving as maid and whore?
If people are mature, educated adults, they can make a divorce "work" for kids. Of course its not the ideal situation; but putting the kids first in marriage AND divorce is imperative. remaining civil with each other after a separation is far better than ignorance and bitterness in a marriage.
Dear Valerie, if you were my client one of my first priorities would be to determine whether or not you and the children are safe in your marriage relationship. If there is abuse, addictions and on-going affairs then a spouse and children are not safe. If basic safety exists then mom and dad need to understand the dangers they are presenting to their children when they divorce. Though many children are able to deal with the divorce of their parents okay, there are many children who are not and I am not sure any children get through a divorce without being scarred--my own case work bears it out.
The argument that children fare better when mom and dad are happy living separately rather than living together in bitterness sounds logical sounds reasonable, but in fact, it is not. Because of the loss of income that is a consequence of most divorces and the loss of a place to call their own, children suffer material loss. Because of the sexualized atmosphere of their parent's new romantic interests, children are predisposed to early sexual behavior and sexual abuse. Because the new "significant others" have no investment in the lives of the children, physical and verbal abuse is much more likely. Emotional and psychological harm result from the grief of the loss of relationships as they were, and the thought, in the children's mind, that they caused the loss. No matter how much the parent's tell them that they are not the cause, the children still believe it because the parents have lied about other things. The children believe they are not loved too.
Finally, your response indicates that, though you and your husband might be educated adults, emotionally you are not acting like mature adults. Your children have the greatest stake in your marriage. It is time to grow up for the sake of the children. If, when your youngest child is 18, you still feel as you do towards your husband, then go for a divorce but your children need you and your husband to provide a stable home life for them now. From the tone of your letter, it sounds like your communication style is that the husband demands and you withdraw. You are about to extremely withdraw in divorce. Do not. Rather, learn to set boundaries and clearly communicate what you expect of him. If you do that, in 18 years you will probably enjoy being his wife.
Our Father's Blessings,
Tom
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Sunday, May 22, 2011
COMMUNION MEDITATION INSPIRED BY HAROLD CAMPING
And as they were eating, he took bread, and blessed, and broke it, and gave it to them, and said, "Take; this is my body." And he took a cup, and when he had given thanks he gave it to them, and they all drank of it. And he said to them, "This is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many. Truly, I say to you, I shall not drink again of the fruit of the vine until that day when I drink it new in the kingdom of God" (Mark 14:22-25).
It was my turn on the rotation to bring the communion meditation. As I pondered what thoughts to bring it struck me that something connected with what has been on most people's mind this last week might be most meaningful. Because of the publicity given to Harold Camping's prediction of the rapture on the 21st, I thought these thoughts would be meaningful.
The celebration of the Lord's Supper is a backward look. Jesus said that the purpose of the Lord's Supper was a memorial to him (I Corinthians 11:24&25). We must never forget the reason for our hope, pardon and forgiveness!
The celebration of the Lord's Supper is an inward look. The celebration of Communion in a worthy manner includes self-examination. There cannot be any appreciation of what Jesus has done for us if there is not an honest appraisal of one's own heart. While our evil thoughts and actions might not be evident to others, God knows and we know. Any one who thinks, "I'm good enough to make it to Heaven" will likely not be there!
The celebration of the Lord's Supper is a forward look. If Harold Camping was right, we would all be celebrating the Eucharist together with the Lord Jesus right now, but we are not. How do you feel about that? I am disappointed! I would rather be raptured than to die. However, I knew that Camping was wrong the minute I heard the date and the time because Jesus said, But of the day and hour now one know, not even the angels of heaven, nor the Son, but the Father only (Matthew 24:36). How is it that otherwise intelligent people can be so stupid as to contradict the clear teachings of Scripture. In an effort to discourage the date-setters of his time, Isaac Newton said that the Lord will not return before 2060. Nevertheless, datesetters still abound. Celebrating the Lord's Supper does remind us to look ahead to the time when we will all celebrate it together in Heaven with our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. What a celebration that will be!!!
Our Father's Blessings,
Tom
It was my turn on the rotation to bring the communion meditation. As I pondered what thoughts to bring it struck me that something connected with what has been on most people's mind this last week might be most meaningful. Because of the publicity given to Harold Camping's prediction of the rapture on the 21st, I thought these thoughts would be meaningful.
The celebration of the Lord's Supper is a backward look. Jesus said that the purpose of the Lord's Supper was a memorial to him (I Corinthians 11:24&25). We must never forget the reason for our hope, pardon and forgiveness!
The celebration of the Lord's Supper is an inward look. The celebration of Communion in a worthy manner includes self-examination. There cannot be any appreciation of what Jesus has done for us if there is not an honest appraisal of one's own heart. While our evil thoughts and actions might not be evident to others, God knows and we know. Any one who thinks, "I'm good enough to make it to Heaven" will likely not be there!
The celebration of the Lord's Supper is a forward look. If Harold Camping was right, we would all be celebrating the Eucharist together with the Lord Jesus right now, but we are not. How do you feel about that? I am disappointed! I would rather be raptured than to die. However, I knew that Camping was wrong the minute I heard the date and the time because Jesus said, But of the day and hour now one know, not even the angels of heaven, nor the Son, but the Father only (Matthew 24:36). How is it that otherwise intelligent people can be so stupid as to contradict the clear teachings of Scripture. In an effort to discourage the date-setters of his time, Isaac Newton said that the Lord will not return before 2060. Nevertheless, datesetters still abound. Celebrating the Lord's Supper does remind us to look ahead to the time when we will all celebrate it together in Heaven with our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. What a celebration that will be!!!
Our Father's Blessings,
Tom
Monday, May 16, 2011
EVIDENCE OF THINGS NOT SEEN
Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen (Hebrews 11:1 KJV).
While there are much better translations of Hebrews 11:1, the King James Version provides a truth about faith that is missing in the other translations and that is the evidence of things not seen. The faith that we have in God is not a leap of faith, it is not blind faith, but it is a reasonable faith based on evidence.
God has always required faith as the basis of a relationship with Him. And without faith it is impossible to please God. Those who come to Him must believe that He exists and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him (Hebrews 11:6). Faith in an invisible God is a tough sell, but that faith has always distinguished Hebrews and Christians from others. Paul writes a wonderful benediction to Timothy: Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory forever and ever. Amen (I T. 1:17).
God has not left us without evidence of His existence and presence! The heavens declare the glory of God and the skies proclaim the work of his hands (Psalms 19:1). For since the creation of the world, His invisible attributes, His eternal power and divine nature have been clearly seen, being understood through what has been made so that they are without excuse (Romans 1:20). There is plenty of evidence in our universe of intelligent design. Even though that evidence "slaps them in the face" many refuse to see because of the implication of what life means if there is a creator God.
God has left us with the evidence of fulfilled prophecy. The Bible is full of examples of prophecy fulfilled. Daniel's seventy-weeks prophecy comes most readily to mind in Daniel chapter 9, but there are many others. Because of Daniel's prophecy, there were many like Anna and Simeon waiting in expectancy for the promised Messiah when Jesus came (see Luke 2:21-38).
Ultimately, the evidence of things not seen is the resurrection of Christ from the dead. Christians have always said that without the resurrection there is no Christianity: and if Christ has not been raised, your faith is worthless . . . (I Corinthians 15:17). The risen Christ was seen by more than five hundred people. They are credible witnesses because they were martyred for their witness. People do not knowingly die for a lie.
Blaise Pascal was a Christian, philosopher and mathematician. He is famous for his wager that goes something like this: If one lives his life as if God is and He isn't then he has lost nothing. If one lives his life as if God isn't and He is he has lost everything. While Pascal's wager is true, it should not be the reason for why a person is a Christian. Pascal's wager is not the basis of a relationship--faith is. We have a faith relationship with God, confident in the expectation of Heaven because of what Jesus has done for us. It is confidence in a relationship, not in a wager.
Our Father's Blessings,
Tom
While there are much better translations of Hebrews 11:1, the King James Version provides a truth about faith that is missing in the other translations and that is the evidence of things not seen. The faith that we have in God is not a leap of faith, it is not blind faith, but it is a reasonable faith based on evidence.
God has always required faith as the basis of a relationship with Him. And without faith it is impossible to please God. Those who come to Him must believe that He exists and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him (Hebrews 11:6). Faith in an invisible God is a tough sell, but that faith has always distinguished Hebrews and Christians from others. Paul writes a wonderful benediction to Timothy: Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory forever and ever. Amen (I T. 1:17).
God has not left us without evidence of His existence and presence! The heavens declare the glory of God and the skies proclaim the work of his hands (Psalms 19:1). For since the creation of the world, His invisible attributes, His eternal power and divine nature have been clearly seen, being understood through what has been made so that they are without excuse (Romans 1:20). There is plenty of evidence in our universe of intelligent design. Even though that evidence "slaps them in the face" many refuse to see because of the implication of what life means if there is a creator God.
God has left us with the evidence of fulfilled prophecy. The Bible is full of examples of prophecy fulfilled. Daniel's seventy-weeks prophecy comes most readily to mind in Daniel chapter 9, but there are many others. Because of Daniel's prophecy, there were many like Anna and Simeon waiting in expectancy for the promised Messiah when Jesus came (see Luke 2:21-38).
Ultimately, the evidence of things not seen is the resurrection of Christ from the dead. Christians have always said that without the resurrection there is no Christianity: and if Christ has not been raised, your faith is worthless . . . (I Corinthians 15:17). The risen Christ was seen by more than five hundred people. They are credible witnesses because they were martyred for their witness. People do not knowingly die for a lie.
Blaise Pascal was a Christian, philosopher and mathematician. He is famous for his wager that goes something like this: If one lives his life as if God is and He isn't then he has lost nothing. If one lives his life as if God isn't and He is he has lost everything. While Pascal's wager is true, it should not be the reason for why a person is a Christian. Pascal's wager is not the basis of a relationship--faith is. We have a faith relationship with God, confident in the expectation of Heaven because of what Jesus has done for us. It is confidence in a relationship, not in a wager.
Our Father's Blessings,
Tom
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
A LATE MOTHER'S-DAY THOUGHT
So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them (Genesis 1:27).
Because of the season, I have been very busy on the farm. As a result, I have not kept up on my writing responsibilities as I should; please forgive me.
One of the thoughts I wanted to develop for Mother's Day was this: Even though Jesus taught us to address God as our Father, the complete expression of God's personality is both masculine and feminine. Both males and females are created in the image of God. Though my study on this subject is far from complete, I will share four verses that point to God's desire to nurture, and care for people as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings to protect them.
I long to dwell in your tent forever and take refuge in the shelter of your wings (Psalms 61:4).
Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings (Psalms 63:7).
The Lord recompense you for what you have done, and a full reward be given to you by the Lord, the God of Israel, under whose wings you have come to take refuge (Ruth 2:12).
O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, killing the prophets and stoning those who are sent to you! How often would I have gathered your children together as a hen gathers her brood under her wings, and you would not! (Matthew 23:37).
Much more can be said about this, but the point I want to emphasize it this: Those women who manifest the image of God in their lives of loving and nurturing children are mothers whether they have given birth or not.
Our Father's Blessings,
Tom
Because of the season, I have been very busy on the farm. As a result, I have not kept up on my writing responsibilities as I should; please forgive me.
One of the thoughts I wanted to develop for Mother's Day was this: Even though Jesus taught us to address God as our Father, the complete expression of God's personality is both masculine and feminine. Both males and females are created in the image of God. Though my study on this subject is far from complete, I will share four verses that point to God's desire to nurture, and care for people as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings to protect them.
I long to dwell in your tent forever and take refuge in the shelter of your wings (Psalms 61:4).
Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings (Psalms 63:7).
The Lord recompense you for what you have done, and a full reward be given to you by the Lord, the God of Israel, under whose wings you have come to take refuge (Ruth 2:12).
O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, killing the prophets and stoning those who are sent to you! How often would I have gathered your children together as a hen gathers her brood under her wings, and you would not! (Matthew 23:37).
Much more can be said about this, but the point I want to emphasize it this: Those women who manifest the image of God in their lives of loving and nurturing children are mothers whether they have given birth or not.
Our Father's Blessings,
Tom
Tuesday, May 03, 2011
WALKING WITH MY GRANDSON
Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so? (Amos 3:3).
Helen and I do not have many grandchildren (Only five) but the ones we do have are the best! This past weekend, Helen and I drove to Iowa City to attend grandparents day at Heritage Christian School where Alex and Samantha attend. We were able to visit the classes that Alex and Samantha attend and have a first-hand look at academics from a Christian perspective. It was well worth the time to do this!
The remainder of the weekend we just had a good time "hanging out" together. It is part of my daily routine to take a walk, so Alex volunteered to walk with his grampa. As it turned out, grampa walked with Alex more than he walked with me. Alex is just 12 years old, but he already stands 5' 10" and has long legs. He nearly walked my legs off! I have never been a fast walker, liking to think, meditate and pray as I walk. Walking with Alex, one has to concentrate on keeping up with the pace--no time for dallying! For Alex we were just walking his normal pace.
Often people cannot walk together because they have cut themselves off from each other so that even a simple walk in the park is not doable because of anger, bitterness, and false beliefs. While I was walking with Alex I was thinking how blessed I am to be able to enjoy something so simple as a daily walk with my grandson.
Our Father's Blessings,
Tom
Helen and I do not have many grandchildren (Only five) but the ones we do have are the best! This past weekend, Helen and I drove to Iowa City to attend grandparents day at Heritage Christian School where Alex and Samantha attend. We were able to visit the classes that Alex and Samantha attend and have a first-hand look at academics from a Christian perspective. It was well worth the time to do this!
The remainder of the weekend we just had a good time "hanging out" together. It is part of my daily routine to take a walk, so Alex volunteered to walk with his grampa. As it turned out, grampa walked with Alex more than he walked with me. Alex is just 12 years old, but he already stands 5' 10" and has long legs. He nearly walked my legs off! I have never been a fast walker, liking to think, meditate and pray as I walk. Walking with Alex, one has to concentrate on keeping up with the pace--no time for dallying! For Alex we were just walking his normal pace.
Often people cannot walk together because they have cut themselves off from each other so that even a simple walk in the park is not doable because of anger, bitterness, and false beliefs. While I was walking with Alex I was thinking how blessed I am to be able to enjoy something so simple as a daily walk with my grandson.
Our Father's Blessings,
Tom
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