MARRIAGE THOUGHTS

"Therefore a man leaves his father and his mother and cleaves to his wife, and they become one flesh" (Genesis 2:24).

I am officiating a wedding this weekend. Some thoughts have been rolling around in my head about what needs to be said:

1. Leaving home is required of both husband and wife. This means a change in relationship to parents. Now the relationship to parents has to be subordinate to the marriage relationship. In many cases the bonds to parents are still very strong, but they cannot be allowed to undermine the marriage relationship. Make sure you have truly left home! "When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I thought like a child and I reasoned as a child; when I became a man, I gave up childish ways" (I Corinthians 13:11).

2. Marriage is a Divine institution. Thus, it is a matter of faith, and is a statement of our faith in God. Being a Divine institution, marriage is what God says it is, not what any executive, legislator or court says it is. By the power invested in me by God and recognized by the state, I pronounce you husband and wife.

3. The seeds of destruction are found in every relationship. Even if a couple has all of Neil Clark Warren's 29 dimensions of compatibility there is not a guarantee of a successful marriage. Those seeds of destruction must be weeded out when they begin to sprout and grow. How can these weeds be recognized? By understanding what love is and what love isn't: "Love is patient and kind; love is not jealous or boastful; it is not arrogant or rude. Love does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in the wrong, but rejoices in the right. Love bears all things, believes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. . ." (I Corinthians 13:4-8a). Weed out the things that are not consistent with love!

These thoughts are not posted in the order what the ceremony will be, but I believe them important enough to be included in the ceremony

Grace&Peace,
Tom