CHANGING FROM THE OUTSIDE IN

IT IS EASIER TO ACT YOUR WAY INTO A NEW WAY OF FEELING THAN TO FEEL YOUR WAY INTO A NEW WAY OF ACTING.

I believe it was William Glasser who first said it, but that little saying has etched its way into the dark recesses of my mind. It is one of the principles I use in counseling. Jesus, I think, was the first to state the principle when he commanded us to love (agape) our enemies (Luke 6:27). Generally outward change follows inward change. Sometimes, though, one must first change behavior to change feelings. Agape love is not based on feelings and emotions, it is based on faith and obedience. If we waited until we had loving feelings for an enemy to love him, we never would! To develop loving feelings one must first go through the action of showing love to him. Whether the enemy is a spouse or a coworker, one must show love before one will feel love.

Oh--uh! The love may never be returned but you will be rewarded with a changed outlook on life!

Grace & Peace;
Tom