To the rest I say, not the Lord, that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him . . . But if the unbelieving partner desires to separate, let it be so; in such case the brother or sister is not bound. For God has called us to peace(I Corinthians 7: 12-15).
A book could be written about these verses, but this is only a devotional, so I will only make one point: Marriage does require a person to become an adult. If a marriage is to succeed and flourish, each partner has to grow and mature. Successful people are not static, staying the same throughout their lives. It is inevitable that one of the partners will make the decision to grow. When one spouse hears the call of God to become an adult, the other spouse is faced with these choices: 1) to become an adult, too, 2) to live with it, facing the possibility of becoming an adult, him/her self, or 3) to sabotage the growth by threatening to leave, or some other means of causing trouble in the family relationship. The best way to help a marriage partner is not to surrender to the trouble, but to continue on the path of growing in faith, knowledge and personal responsibility. If a spouse refuses to come along, not much else can be done to help him or her to mature and he or she will continue to live as a child in a world that desperately needs adults.
Our Father's Love,
Tom
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
PUNISHING YOURSELF FOR YOUR OWN SINS? (A Communion Meditation)
But if we walk in the light, as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus His Son cleanses us from all sin. If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just, and will forgive our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness (I John 1:7-9).
I was randomly searching for a communion meditation thought when I found a blurb from an old issue of Psychology Today. The question was asked, "Does guilt cause people to punish themselves?" There definitely is a correlation between the emotion of guilt and cutting/self mutilation, binge eating, self-sabotage and even suicide.
Brock Bastian, a psychologist at the university of Queensland, used this test to research the question, Does guilt cause people to punish themselves? Dr. Bastian asked people if they had done something bad that made them feel guilty. He asked them to write about it. He asked each participant, if they felt guilty or not, to put their arm in ice water as long as they could stand it. Then they could pull their arm out.
This little test revealed that: 1) Those who felt guilty kept their arms in the ice water longer; 2) These same people rated the experience more painful, and 3) This experience of punishing one's self reduced the guilty person's perception of guilt.
What does this mean for communion? There is no self-punishment that can pay for our sins. Only the blood of Jesus can cleanse us. All the Lord requires is that sinful behavior be recognized and confessed, and it is forgiven; guilt is taken away. Do not think that because one has suffered because of his sinful behavior he is less guilty.
The Lord's Table is the family table for Christians to gather around, confessing their sins. They know that their guilt is taken away because of the ultimate gift of God in the sacrifice of his Son, Jesus Christ.
Our Father's Love,
Tom
*The book of I John was written to Christians; non Christians were not the primary audience.
I was randomly searching for a communion meditation thought when I found a blurb from an old issue of Psychology Today. The question was asked, "Does guilt cause people to punish themselves?" There definitely is a correlation between the emotion of guilt and cutting/self mutilation, binge eating, self-sabotage and even suicide.
Brock Bastian, a psychologist at the university of Queensland, used this test to research the question, Does guilt cause people to punish themselves? Dr. Bastian asked people if they had done something bad that made them feel guilty. He asked them to write about it. He asked each participant, if they felt guilty or not, to put their arm in ice water as long as they could stand it. Then they could pull their arm out.
This little test revealed that: 1) Those who felt guilty kept their arms in the ice water longer; 2) These same people rated the experience more painful, and 3) This experience of punishing one's self reduced the guilty person's perception of guilt.
What does this mean for communion? There is no self-punishment that can pay for our sins. Only the blood of Jesus can cleanse us. All the Lord requires is that sinful behavior be recognized and confessed, and it is forgiven; guilt is taken away. Do not think that because one has suffered because of his sinful behavior he is less guilty.
The Lord's Table is the family table for Christians to gather around, confessing their sins. They know that their guilt is taken away because of the ultimate gift of God in the sacrifice of his Son, Jesus Christ.
Our Father's Love,
Tom
*The book of I John was written to Christians; non Christians were not the primary audience.
Sunday, May 20, 2012
PONYSHO
Sing to the Lord, for he has triumphed gloriously; the horse and his rider he has thrown into the sea (Exodus 15:18).
I went and did it. I've always wanted to have a Mustang convertible with a V8 engine and some sweet sounding pipes, and it was like the Lord wanted me to have it too. I had noticed this car before, sitting on a used car dealers lot, but I could never justify spending the money to buy a big-boy toy to play with. I was returning from Helen's parent's house in Kansas, driving home alone. Driving through Lyndon, Kansas, I noticed that the Mustang convertible was still on the lot--a definite sign from God. Still, I never would have stopped to check it out if I would have had a passenger--another sign. I still drove past the used car lot, but I had this funny feeling in the pit of my stomach that I would regret not stopping to check it out--a third sign. So, I turned around and went back. The price on the care was about $1500 less than I expected--a 4th sign? So with all these signs, who was I to say "no" to the Lord? So, I bought the car, although I do not have it at home yet.
As a final note, the lovely and gracious Helen is OK with it, but I think it tested her a little. And really, I was just teasing about all the signs from the Lord--but I think He might be OK with it too. If I can make it work I will put up a picture of a Mustang exactly like the one I bought--I hope this doesn't turn out to be just another pony show.
Our Father's Blessings,
Tom
I went and did it. I've always wanted to have a Mustang convertible with a V8 engine and some sweet sounding pipes, and it was like the Lord wanted me to have it too. I had noticed this car before, sitting on a used car dealers lot, but I could never justify spending the money to buy a big-boy toy to play with. I was returning from Helen's parent's house in Kansas, driving home alone. Driving through Lyndon, Kansas, I noticed that the Mustang convertible was still on the lot--a definite sign from God. Still, I never would have stopped to check it out if I would have had a passenger--another sign. I still drove past the used car lot, but I had this funny feeling in the pit of my stomach that I would regret not stopping to check it out--a third sign. So, I turned around and went back. The price on the care was about $1500 less than I expected--a 4th sign? So with all these signs, who was I to say "no" to the Lord? So, I bought the car, although I do not have it at home yet.
As a final note, the lovely and gracious Helen is OK with it, but I think it tested her a little. And really, I was just teasing about all the signs from the Lord--but I think He might be OK with it too. If I can make it work I will put up a picture of a Mustang exactly like the one I bought--I hope this doesn't turn out to be just another pony show.
Our Father's Blessings,
Friday, May 11, 2012
IN SORROW, CHRISTIANS HAVE HOPE
But we would not have you ignorant, brethren, concerning those who are asleep, that you may not grieve as others do who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and rose again . . . (I Thessalonians 4:13-14a).
The lovely and gracious Helen's dad passed away this morning. Charles Huff's death is a great loss to the Tom Steele family. Of course, Helen's dad had a great deal to do with Helen being the kind of woman I would want to be my wife and the mother of our children. That fact alone made him an important man to me. He was a very important grandfather role model and mentor to our children. His influence was an important dynamic in the formation and function of our family; we will grieve his loss for quite sometime.
What I want each reader to understand is that in our family we believe that we have not seen the last of Charles Huff! If one has ever touched a corpse, to possess a hope that the dead person will ever be seen alive again is quite audacious, to say the least. Yet, based on the history of the death, burial and resurrection of Jesus Christ, that is exactly what we believe. Death is only sleep when Jesus Christ is around. The Christian does not have to say, "Goodbye" to Charles, only, "So long, see you later."
Our Father's Love,
Tom
The lovely and gracious Helen's dad passed away this morning. Charles Huff's death is a great loss to the Tom Steele family. Of course, Helen's dad had a great deal to do with Helen being the kind of woman I would want to be my wife and the mother of our children. That fact alone made him an important man to me. He was a very important grandfather role model and mentor to our children. His influence was an important dynamic in the formation and function of our family; we will grieve his loss for quite sometime.
What I want each reader to understand is that in our family we believe that we have not seen the last of Charles Huff! If one has ever touched a corpse, to possess a hope that the dead person will ever be seen alive again is quite audacious, to say the least. Yet, based on the history of the death, burial and resurrection of Jesus Christ, that is exactly what we believe. Death is only sleep when Jesus Christ is around. The Christian does not have to say, "Goodbye" to Charles, only, "So long, see you later."
Our Father's Love,
Tom
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